What happened today is that my mother picked me up from work and told me that my brother is in a psych hospital in Rhode Island because he’s been violent in a way he and others can’t control and has been doing stuff like knocking down furniture and throwing things. They’re not sure when he will be out. Then she took me out to dinner. I was pretty sure that if I went home I would have some kind of intense bad experience, so I went on the train the opposite way from home (on which there was a man walking up and down the car and shouting about sin and hell so loudly and continuously that he was literally hoarse), and I went to a shop and bought a nostril piercing, and now I am sitting here on the couch with a new piece of steel in my face and pajamas on and I feel very sore and very tired and I don’t know what will make me feel better and I don’t “feel bad” even though I wonder whether that would be better (??). I want one of the cats I know purring on my lap. I’m just tired and numb and the world is scary and I hate hearing my parents talk about my brother this way.

underthescopemin:

ALMANDINE GARNETS  in Graphite

underthescopemin:

ALMANDINE GARNETS  in Graphite

(via aprilwitching)

I would also like to confirm that I definitely still have my normal face, as indicated by a picture from this morning, and my boss’s pronoun problems are not the result of a partial fall backwards through time

Her dog barked at me intermittently all morning! It is astounding how much I frighten (or anger) that dog, who just does not bark at anyone else.

(okay no more lunch break)

I would also like to confirm that I definitely still have my normal face, as indicated by a picture from this morning, and my boss’s pronoun problems are not the result of a partial fall backwards through time

Her dog barked at me intermittently all morning! It is astounding how much I frighten (or anger) that dog, who just does not bark at anyone else.

(okay no more lunch break)

I realize this is a gratingly Old Man way to phrase it, but what the actual hell is going on with all these teenagers’ writings I am looking at today. I keep coming across piece after piece about Cool Kids Smoking Cigarettes and Alienatedly Chatting written with the most archaic Cool Kid signifiers. I feel like I’ve fallen into a pit of 1990s teen movie VHSes.

I’m still churning over “Homo meaning confused or mixed up.” Confused or mixed  sex  is evil for the simple reason it has many unpleasant and unhealthy results. Did this person or this person’s teachers consciously intend to convey the racism that’s also implicit here (“mixing” = bad)? Is the logic actually supposed to imply “anything that has unpleasant and unhealthy results is necessarily evil,” or is the wording just sloppy enough that it suggests that by accident? (I’m genuinely pretty curious about this last point and wouldn’t mind hearing from you if you know whether or not those ideas are common in conservative Christianity.)

I don’t know what it would be like to feel convinced that all things I find “unpleasant” are necessarily evil, or that it is a sign of being evil to be ill (or “do unhealthy things,” whatever that means). It seems like it’d be really hard to be compassionate about most death, for one thing, while adhering to that belief system. (Death by violence more morally acceptable than death by illness?) (!)

comment @ work

Homosexual behavior is somthing done not what a person is.  Homo  meaning confused or mixed up. This can pretain to many things like milk which is Homogenised…cream being mixed with the milk. Confused or mixed  sex  is evil for the simple reason it has many unpleasant and unhealthy results. To even consider such a mistake is evidence that these so called adults have little or no edjucation to empart to a child and should be reschooled in a proper school….not a Roman one obviously.

I was totally baffled by this until it occurred to me that “Roman” is probably some kind of conservative Christian jargon for “not Christian.” The etymological claim is definitely false; “homo-” never means “mixed.” Its meaning “the same” is just about the opposite. I wonder who circulates this rumor.